Saturday, December 15, 2018
Sherri Sharma, partner at Aronson, Mayefsky & Sloan, LLP, a matrimonial law firm in NYC typically sees divorcing parents who take a nesting approach by keeping the main house and then sharing a separate apartment, which they individually occupy when not “at home” with the children.
“The way I've seen nesting done is not people having three homes, as most people, even quite wealthy clients, don't find that feasible,” Sharma tells NBC News BETTER. “Usually the parents have a studio apartment they share and rotate, and then keep the marital home where the children stay put.”
The motivating concept behind nesting, as Sharma puts it, is “there's little disruption for the kids. They're not being affected [environmentally] by the fact that their parents are separating.”
Sharma has seen nesting work out well for clients who are parting amicably, but only if it’s done in the short-term.
“I’ve never seen ‘nesting’ go on forever,” says Sharma. “A few months is okay but for longer periods (beyond six months), I think the uncertainty of not knowing what it will really be like to have separate homes can be confusing or anxiety-[inducing] for children.”
Dr. Fran Walfish, a family and relationship psychotherapist and the author of “The Self-Aware Parent: Resolving Conflict and Building a Better Bond with Your Child” concurs with Sharma on a short-term nesting plan, and actually finds this method to be beneficial to children. She caps it at three months.
Read more here.