Thursday, February 8, 2018
Student, 21, Flushed Her ‘Emotional Support’ HAMSTER Pebbles Down the Toilet and Drowned It After Spirit Airlines Banned It from Traveling with Her (and Now She’s Suing)
Belen Aldecosea, 21, was attempting to fly home toting her beloved and cherished support animal, her hamster, Pebbles. Aldecosea claims that she called Spirit Airlines prior to her flight to make sure Pebbles would be allowed on the plane. When she attempted boarding with innocent bright-eyed Pebbles though, staff told her rodents were not allowed to fly. At this point, Aldecosea alleges that Spirit employees told her she could either release Pebbles into the wild or flush him down the toilet. Her flight leaving, Aldecosea was forced to take the heart-breaking measure of disposing of the support pet via an unceremonious, ultimate swirly. She is now considering suing the airline for emotional trauma.
See Hannah Parry, Student, 21, Flushed Her ‘Emotional Support’ HAMSTER Pebbles Down the Toilet and Drowned It After Spirit Airlines Banned It from Traveling with Her (and Now She’s Suing), Daily Mail.com, February 8, 2018.
Monday, February 5, 2018
A Wisconsin funeral home is offering an unconventional (at least for the industry) incentive to those willing to come and consider pre-planning their funeral: free pizza. Fliers advertising the latest promotion read, “Enjoy free pizza on us as we discuss how pre-planning your funeral helps ease the emotional and financial burden for you and your family.” Mark Krause, the funeral home owner, noted that with funeral expenses constantly increasing, pre-planning is appealing to many as it offers the possibility of big savings. The free pizza simply provides a more relaxed and comfortable environment that encourages people to discuss a topic that is traditionally uncomfortable. The company offered a similar incentive last year and over 100 people showed up to the event.
See Michelle Gant, Funeral Home Offering Free Pizza To Those Who Pre-plan Their Funerals, Fox News, January 29, 2018.
When considering chicken, most people mentally meander toward fancies of delicious, deep-fried wings and thighs or sweet memories of summer barbeques with family and friends permeated by the tantalizing scent of slow-cooked delicacies. But, for a family in Bryan, Texas, their thoughts of chicken return them to memories of their recently deceased and beloved pet: Big Mama. So dearly loved was this winged creature that her family wrote a formal obituary for the 6-year-old, Rhode Island Red. The family saved Big Mama in 2013, after her original owners grew tired of her and left her at a veterinary clinic to be euthanized. Fortunately, Big Mama was saved. With her new family, she quickly “discovered how beautiful life could be walking in the grass, being a member of a flock, and having 24-7 love.”
See Hilary Hanson, Family’s Fabulous Pet Chicken Gets Own Obituary in Local Newspaper, Huffington Post, January 27, 2018.
Special thanks to Laura Galvan (Attorney, San Antonio, Texas) for bringing this article to my attention.
Tuesday, January 30, 2018
Obituary for Veteran with ‘Zero Working Knowledge of the Kardashians’ and a Stash of Miracle Whip Wins over the Internet
Terry Ward, an Indiana veteran, passed away on Tuesday at the age of 71. His daughter, Jean Lahm, wrote an epic obituary as an homage to her father that has since captured the attention of the internet. The obituary sets the down-to-earth tone from the outset: “Terry Wayne Ward, age 71, of DeMotte, Indiana, escaped this mortal realm on Tuesday, January 23rd, 2018, leaving behind 32 jars of Miracle Whip, 17 boxes of Hamburger Helper and multitudes of other random items that would prove helpful in the event of a zombie apocalypse.” Lahm said her intent was to portray he father as he was in life, an “everyday guy” who enjoyed making people laugh.
See Stephanie Haney, Obituary for Veteran with ‘Zero Working Knowledge of the Kardashians’ and a Stash of Miracle Whip Wins over the Internet, DailyMail.com, January 29, 2018.
Wednesday, January 17, 2018
Washington State police are attempting to locate the owner of an urn, remains included, that was donated to a local Goodwill. Authorities believe the urn was brought to the store and discovered by an employee on Sunday. Police are currently working under the premise that the odd act of giving away the remains was accidental.
See Elizabeth Zwirz, Owner of Urn Donated to Goodwill Being Sought by Washington State Police, Fox News, January 14, 2018.
Tuesday, January 9, 2018
‘Dead’ Prisoner Turns out to Be ALIVE When He Starts Wheezing as Doctor Prepares to Cut Him Open for Post-mortem After Blunder by Spanish Jail Wardens
Gonzalo Montoya Jimenez was pronounced dead after prison guards found him unconscious in his cell at a Spanish prison. Jimenez had failed to show up for breakfast, which prompted the guards to search for him. His body was removed from the prison in a body bag and sent for an autopsy. Fortunately for Jimenez, a pathologist noticed the corpse he was about to open up was wheezing. The authorities are currently investigating the cause of the mistake. Jimenez’s family has not yet commented on the odd events.
See Gerard Couzens, ‘Dead’ Prisoner Turns out to Be ALIVE When He Starts Wheezing as Doctor Prepares to Cut Him Open for Post-mortem After Blunder by Spanish Jail Wardens, Daily Mail.com, January 8, 2018.
Friday, October 27, 2017
The modern American has come to accept the yearly ritual of paying taxes as a unpleasant, but routine, requirement. The yoke of this ever-changing encumbrance has been borne and carried by citizens throughout history. The following are a few famous perspectives considering the effect and burden of taxes:
“Income tax returns are the most imaginative fiction being written today.”— Herman Wouk
“Dear Mr. President, Internal Revenue regulations will turn us into a nation of bookkeepers. The life of every citizen is becoming a business. This, it seems to me, is one of the worst interpretations of the meaning of human life history has ever seen. Man's life is not a business.”— Saul Bellow, Herzog, 1964
"When there is an income tax, the just man will pay more and the unjust less on the same amount of income."—Plato
See Julian Block, Writers on Taxes: Quotations of Death and Humor From Plato to John Grisham, accountingweb, August 21, 2017.
Special thanks to Jim Hillhouse (Professional Legal Marketing (PLM, Inc.) for bringing this article to my attention.
Thursday, September 21, 2017
Police in Leitchfield, Kentucky are currently searching for a man who broke into a funeral home and stole a dead man’s clothes and the jewels from his casket. The man broke in through the front door of the funeral home and was caught on video as he napped in a chair, stole a PlayStation 3, and took the keys to a hearse in addition to stealing the dead man’s suit and jewelry. Jason Watson, the funeral director, believes that man is probably the same person who was chased out of a Wal-Mart for shoplifting shortly prior to the break-in.
See Police Hunt for Thief Seen on Camera Taking Dead Man's Clothes at Funeral Home, Fox News, September 15, 2017.
Sunday, September 17, 2017
When Stephen Petrow’s mother turned 80, she rewarded herself with a sporty, fire-engine-red Lexus. Petrow’s high-spirited, feisty mother loved fast, high-octane cars and despite her diminutive 5’2” frame that could barely see over the steering wheel, she drove with a passion that matched her fiery-red Lexus. The results of her impassioned driving began showing up as dents and dings on the exterior of her vehicle, adding to the mounting concerns her children had regarding her ability to drive safely.
Petrow and his brother had both witnessed their mother’s near-collisions with bicyclists and pedestrians on numerous occasions. Petrow’s brother had actually been forced to grab the steering wheel out of his mother’s hands while sitting as passenger in order to prevent a collision. Petrow, and others, had confronted his mother on numerous occasions to no avail; she refused to acknowledge any fault and did not want to sacrifice her freedom to travel where she wished. After a series of semi-serious incidents and in the face of their mother’s absolute refusal to recognize that she was clearly a danger behind the wheel, Petrow and his siblings anonymously turned their mother in to the New York Department of Motor Vehicles (DMV). The New York DMV maintains a driver reevaluation program that allows individuals familiar with another’s bad driving to report them for a specific reason. Subsequent to the report, Petrow’s mother was required to take a driving test. Though she successfully passed the written portion, the instructor of the driving portion failed her, writing: “Extremely dangerous!! Turns wide into wrong side of road! Poor late braking. No observation at all backing. Completely unaware of surroundings. FAILED.” The DMV revoked her license. While Petrow knows this was the right thing to do, he wonders if he will have enough wherewithal later in life to give up his keys voluntarily if he becomes a danger to others.
See Stephen Petrow, When Our Elderly Mother Refused to Stop Driving, We Took Drastic Action, The Washington Post, September 2, 2017.
Special thanks to Lewis Saret (Attorney, Washington, D.C.) for bringing this article to my attention.
Friday, September 15, 2017
BE OUR GUEST: The Secret Code Disney Theme Park Staff Use to Describe the Rudest Visitors – So Have YOU Been Called It?
Disney has implemented a strict set of standards for employees that restricts their use of negative language in front of guests. This may seem strange, but little Sally’s summer vacation might be remembered for the wrong reasons if she happened to overhear Cinderella cursing like a sailor. A very natural response to this limitation has been the introduction and use of colorful colloquialisms by Disney staff.
Difficult guests that are causing a disruption or being extra rude are labeled as “treasured guests”. Rather than say “vomit” or “puke” when a guest tosses their cookies in the park, employees refer to the incident as a “protein spill”. While these descriptors are amusing, perhaps the oddest of the bunch is the “white powder alert”. This call goes out on staff radios when a guest spreads the ashes of a deceased loved one from a ride or a special place at the park. The sentimental nature of the park apparently lends itself to these activities, as there are multiple instances each year where guests successfully spread the ashes of a decedent. In these instances, the “white powder alert” goes out, the ride is stopped, and a smiling Disney staff member is sent to clean up the remains.
See Caroline McGuire, BE OUR GUEST: The Secret Code Disney Theme Park Staff Use to Describe the Rudest Visitors – So Have YOU Been Called It?, The Sun, September 7, 2017.