Thursday, September 8, 2011

Friday Fun: Clients from hell and the "#sshole Lawyer Boyfriend"

The name of this website says it all -  (though the focus is on "anonymously contributed client horror stories" from graphic, print and web designers).

You can pick up some "Day Ruining Invoices" here or maybe buy "Clients from Hell" - the book, here.

A quick search didn't turn up many complaints by or about lawyers.  But there is this:

The #sshole Lawyer Boyfriend

[I’m not a designer but the attorney hired by a designer. I’m informing the client over the phone that he’s being sued for not paying the amount specified.]

Me: “Good afternoon, my name is [xxx], representing [designer] and [company]. We’re calling about payment that has not yet been received for a project which you agreed to pay for.”

Client: “What?! Who’s suing me?! Who is this?”

Me: “As I said, my name is [xxx], representing [designer] and [company]. You have X,XXX.XX that was supposed to be paid several months ago, as agreed upon by a contract with my clients.”

Client: “Are you suing me for a website? You’re not making any damn sense!”

Me: “You owe someone a fair deal of money and you’ve made it very clear that you have no intention of paying. I have several emails from your email address responding to my clients with messages such as “sayonara, suckers” and I am calling to see if you’d like to pay your fees now, or if we need to bring this into a courtroom, which I’m sure we’re all looking to avoid.”

Client: “I don’t know who this is or what the hell you want from me but listen up: fooling someone to make you a website isn’t a crime!”

Me: “You’re actually looking at some large fines and — should this be considered a felony — jail time.”

Client: “You’re a damn lawyer, you should know websites aren’t real. A website isn’t a thing, you can’t steal it! [designer] can still look at it, it’s still kinda his!”

[Within three days time, the designer received a check with the amount listed and an additional $20.00 “for your asshole lawyer boyfriend.” The designer had to resist framing the check for the novelty.]

If you're an attorney who works with designers and has a "client from hell" story of your own, add it here (anonymously, of course).


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