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May 20, 2006
The Importance of a Firm Handshake
Update: A warm welcome to all Fark readers! BTW, the business card comment below was spoken with tongue firmly in cheek.
HR.BLR.com recently posted an interesting story about what impact a job candidate's handshake can have on how he or she is viewed by prospective employers.
According to a survey conducted by the National Association of Colleges and Employers (NACE):
More employers say a job candidate's handshake would likely have a strong influence on their opinion of the individual compared with those say the same about a candidate's body piercing or obvious tattoos . . . .
Thirty-three percent of employers said a candidate's handshake would have a strong influence on their opinion of a job candidate compared with 31 percent who say the same about a body piercing. Twenty-nine percent of respondents said obvious tattoos would have a strong influence on their opinion of a job candidate.
I have to admit a little surprise that so many respondents still care about a good handshake.
Strikes me all as a little silly. And doesn't this just perptuate behaviors that are more comfortably engaged in by men (who try many times to break the other person's arm off)?
My thoughts on what would be better? How about the Japanese ritual of handing one another your business card, evaluating what's on the card, and then deciding the appropriate way to interact with that person?
Just a thought.
PS
May 20, 2006 in Commentary | Permalink
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When I was about twelve an elderly gentleman assured me I was a mensch because I shook his hand firmly. Apparently, a substantial number of other people feel the same [Read More]
Tracked on May 25, 2006 5:45:55 AM
Comments
"..And doesn't this just perptuate behaviors that are more comfortably engaged in by men.."
I disagree with you on this point. As a woman, I have never had a problem with the handshake, nor have I thought of it as a 'male preserve'. I think it reveals just as much about the female candidate and I *do* dislike a limp, can't-be-a*sed handshake from either sex. It gives me the impression of a demeanour only slightly removed from dismissive.
Just my opinion though...what do other women out there think?
Posted by: Julie | May 20, 2006 2:06:52 PM
Business cards? Get real. Learn to shake hands and quit being such a puss.
Posted by: Anon | May 20, 2006 2:24:39 PM
Actually, a good handshake can tell you a lot about a person. A lot more than what a business card (which a huge percentage of applicants won't have, which is why they're applicants in the first place) ever would. A good handshake can show how confident a person is in oneself, how respectful, how physical or shy. It can also show his behavior towards others.
"Trying to break the other person's arm off" is a good indicator of what the person giving the handshake is, and it most definitely doesn't give a good impression of the offending party. A man or a woman can give an equally good handshake without any trouble. Is it a male-oriented behavior? not at all.
Posted by: Elenes | May 20, 2006 3:47:20 PM
God no. There's nothing more creepy than a limp or soft handshake. As a woman, I'd rather have my hand crushed in a vice than given the "limp fish". Makes me cringe just to think of it.
I'd have serious issues hiring anyone with a limp shake - at the very least, they'd have to learn to shake properly if they ever dealt with clients.
Posted by: secretdubai | May 20, 2006 4:40:37 PM
A someone who has sat on many hiring boards and interviewed a great deal of people, men and women, you get used to people lying to you. Resumes are always padded for extra content, the bad things they've done are left out. They tell you what they think you want to hear...etc. So, my job is to find out about this person, and a handshake cant be faked. I'm not saying its super-important, but I can tell when a person has a good or lousy handshake because they are scared, nervous, proud, happy, comfortable. If I am hiring for a computer position to sit in a server closet somewhere, I dont mind if they are scared at shaking the boss's hand. If I am hiring a salesperson, I want comfort around strangers no matter what.
Posted by: John | May 20, 2006 4:46:35 PM
Posted by: Julie | May 20, 2006 2:06:52 PM:
"*do* dislike a limp, can't-be-a*sed handshake from either sex"
What is "can't-be-a*sed" ?
Can't be assed? How is that an descriptive adjective for the word "handshake"?
Do you mean "candy assed" perhaps? Now a "candy assed handshake" would be a wimpy handshake.
--
AJ Simkatu
Posted by: Simkatu | May 20, 2006 4:48:42 PM
I recently got the limp fish from a young woman. I actually got ticked off at her and chided her for her limp fish handshake. As I look back on it the location mattered as it was in a bar. I think she deliberately gave it to me to tell me she really had no interest in talking to me at all.
now that I think even more about it, it still ticks me off.
Posted by: daas | May 20, 2006 6:24:30 PM
Of course handshakes can be faked! Lots of people know that bosses like firm-gripped handshakes. Whether or not you have a strong personality isn't an indicator. I don't have a strong personality and I always grip on interviews because I know it's part of the first impression.
Posted by: Joanna Peal | May 20, 2006 6:26:02 PM
My biggest concern when it comes to handshakes is not the dead fish handshake. Of course, that one IS awful, but it may just be coming from someone who has never learned. What I can't stand is the ridiculous crush-every-bone-in-your-hand grip. What that immediately tells me about the person is that they have something to prove, and that they won't work well in collabrative efforts. As an employer, I am much more likely to hire a limp shaker over a crusher.
Posted by: Everet Long | May 21, 2006 3:41:53 AM
/Of course handshakes can be faked! Lots of people know that bosses like firm-gripped handshakes. Whether or not you have a strong personality isn't an indicator. I don't have a strong personality and I always grip on interviews because I know it's part of the first impression.
I wouldn't hire you, then. Granted, I'm not an employer, but I think it's safe to say by looking both at the other comments and just by looking at human nature in general that a FIRM handshake is not a good handshake. Most people who try to grip come across as people who follow the mandated advice instead of being comfortable with who they are. Yes, candy-assed shakes suck, too, but at least you know those people aren't trying too hard.
Posted by: Dawn | May 21, 2006 8:22:54 AM
I can't wait until the Goose replaces the Handshake.
Posted by: yep | May 21, 2006 8:37:15 AM
I say give them a hickey right off the bat. Don't beat around the bush, just get right to it.
Posted by: Dubya | May 21, 2006 9:39:53 AM
I have received many limp handshakes - and I was the person applying for the job. Personally, I do not like handshakes. I have an aversion to touching other people. Speaking of sweating palms........
Posted by: David | May 21, 2006 4:43:32 PM
As the son of a salesman, I'd have to agree with most of the commenters that a "good" handshake is extremely important.
It's almost a cliche, but first impressions are the most lasting. They get formed on an almost unconscious level, and are extremely hard to change. On an interview, you might not get the chance to overcome a bad one.
Although handshakes can be faked, I'd look negatively at someone who didn't at least make the effort to learn/follow the accepted "forms".
Maybe that makes me shallow, but I doubt I'm alone.
Posted by: The Unknown Professor | May 25, 2006 12:04:28 PM
I believe that people who give firm handshakes are more often than not very sincere,honest, have no axe to grind with the person whose hand they are shaking, and are saying that they are trustworthy and can be relied upon. The person who presents a limp handshake I believe, might be giving the impression that he/she can not be depended upon and that if they can be depended upon to day,tomorrow it might not necessarily be so. I have often had people complement me on my firm handshake and I believe that because of my close personal relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ and my desire to be more like him, in terms of keeping my word and loving people I possess those positive qualities listed above.
Posted by: Beatrice | May 31, 2006 11:58:57 AM
The fact so much information can be offered about handshakes is an indicator that a handshake is conveying a message.
A good handshake between men is not a bone crushing experience and when done between men who are sharing the bond of touch, they are smiling, their hands are open, they have eye contact and it's heartfelt.
Long lost friends usually hug with their free hands.
In a business relationship where the parties aren't familiar with one another, the ability to reproduce an approximation of a heartfelt handshake allows each person to understand that they have experienced comraderie at such a heartfelt level.They understand developing bonds and teamwork.
A woman offers a man her hand.
A man never reaches out for a woman's hand.
It's a woman's discretion.
There are volumes to be written on what that in itself connotates.
If the woman offers her hand vertically she is doing business on a level playing field.
That means accountability.
Palm down, the woman is displaying etiquette and it is not a business handshake.
It means the man is admiring the woman on introduction.
Men do not shake a woman's hand palm down.
A man who displays power over a woman, doesn't have any.
Shaking another man's hand palm down is communication as well.
Dogs just offer up their bellies.
Only the Pope should shake someone's hand palm down. Atheist's will never be close enough to be offended.
As for the limp fish handsake, it's a gender neutral abomination.
It is the reason people shake hands.
I have ended a meeting on the handshake in sheer disgust.
There was no way I was allowing large funds or important matters to be rec'd into such a lifeless display of personal contact.
Was I over reacting?
Was this person the charge of energy and tenaciousness I'd been looking for?
We all know the answer.
Posted by: John Merry | Jun 15, 2006 4:34:42 PM
