HealthLawProf Blog

Editor: Katharine Van Tassel
Akron Univ. School of Law

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Thursday, April 21, 2005

Funny Living Will

If the Schiavo case has you considering how to draft a living will, you may want to check out The New Yorker's "Shouts and Murmurs" column by Paul Rudnick.  The column is entitled, "My Living Will."  Here are a few of my favorite provisions:

           1.   If I should remain in a persistent vegetative state for more than fifteen years, I would like someone to turn off the TV.

12.  If my doctor pronounces me brain-dead, I would like to see the new Ashton Kutcher movie.

15.  I would like to die at home, surrounded by my attorneys.       

17.   In lieu of flowers or donations, I would prefer rioting.

18.  I would like my entire estate to become the property of my cat, Fluffy, who said, “He wouldn’t want to live like this, with that zit.”      

22.  At my memorial service, I would like my clergyman to begin his eulogy with the words “I suppose, in a way, we all killed him.”

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