Thursday, March 17, 2005
From Interstate 60 (2002)
Valerie: Valerie McCabe, Yale ‘91. I’ve got a special rate for visitors, and I know I can win your case.
Neal: You don’t even know my case.
Valerie: The Madison case? Nuisance suit. Happens to visitors all the time. Fact is J.J. Madison doesn’t even have a cat. He’s allergic. I could have it thrown out in no time.
Neal: Wait, he never had a cat? So, why’s he going to sue somebody for it?
Valerie: Because he can.
Valerie: Every adult citizen of Morlaw is a lawyer, so everybody sues everybody else. It doesn’t matter if there’s a cause. It’s how we ensure that everyone makes a living off their profession.
Neal: Yeah, but that’s insane.
Valerie: I could sue you for that. You just made a defamatory remark about his town. Hey, are you looking at my legs? I could sue you for that too, sexual harassment.
Neal: Is there anything you can’t sue me for?
Valerie: Hire me. That way, everything between us is subject to attorney-client privilege. I’m $75 an hour. First hour is free.
Neal: Well, at least you know my case. All right, you’re hired.