Saturday, May 6, 2006

A Day to Savor

My wife gave me a ring the day I graduated from law school.  I had never had a class ring before and had never really cared about having one until then.  After three years of law school, however, I wanted that one. 

It symbolized all that we had given up and all that I had poured into obtaining that degree.  It reminded me that I had not been fooling myself when I decided to take on law school, that I had really been able to do it after all.  It reminded me of the faith my wife had shown in me over those three years, never wondering if we had done the right thing or if I would do well.

During the bar exam, I deliberately stopped every so often, looked at the ring, and told myself, "Even if I fail this exam and never get to practice law, I earned that law degree and that fact can't change." 

For those who never doubted their ability to succeed in law school, they will probably find it tough to relate to such feelings.  But I didn't enter law school sure of my success, and even at the end I couldn't shake that "smoke and mirrors" feeling, that feeling that I somehow I had been getting away with something all along and that eventually I'd get caught and that everyone would finally know that I had no business going to law school.

In a couple of hours, I will watch another class walk across the stage to receive their diplomas and hoods.  It will be their turn to bask in that glow of success that attends such ceremonies.  Many of them, I suspect, will marvel, as I did when I graduated, that it all worked out, that law school wasn't beyond them after all. They will all be able to drop the anxiety and stress of the past three years and take a moment to relish the fact that they have earned law degrees and that nothing can change that fact.

The bar exam will be here soon enough, and those first years of practice will be upon them, with all the same fears and self-doubt. 

Today, however, all those things should be in the distance.  For a day or two, they deserve to look back and see what they have accomplished and forget about the challenges to come.  They deserve to relish the unalterable fact that no matter what happens next, no one can ever rob them of the right to say, "I earned a law degree."  (dbw)   

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